Day 142:
I’m way underground, digging through to what looks like a giant chasm, and I’m attacked by zombies.
Child zombies.
Wielding potatoes.
I had to kill child zombies who were trying to kill me with potatoes today because if I didn’t kill these little six-year-old monsters they would have kept going until they killed me and we all know a six year old has more energy than a nuclear power plant.
I’m not saying I’m the best at what I do. I’m not even saying I’m a good person.
But when a child tries fervently to kill you with a potato, well, you can’t help but doubt whether you look scary enough to protect yourself, you know?
Thinking about making some kind of mask, is what I’m saying. Maybe disguise myself as a cow.
Nobody tries to kill cows with potatoes.